Terms of Service
Last updated: 2026
These are the terms for using offwiththeirdicks.com, operated by Off With Their Dicks, LLC (we, us, our). By using the site or buying anything from us, you agree to these terms.
§1About us
We sell protest apparel and accessories online. Our slogan is satire, political speech, and First Amendment-protected expression. We do not advocate violence against any person, named or implied.
§2Eligibility
You must be at least 18 years old, or have a parent's permission, to buy from us. You must be able to enter into a legally binding contract in your jurisdiction. By placing an order, you confirm both of those.
§3Orders & payment
- All prices are in US dollars unless otherwise noted
- We may refuse or cancel any order at our discretion (suspected fraud, bot traffic, item out of stock, pricing error, etc.). If we cancel, you get a full refund.
- Payment is processed by our payment provider (Shopify or Stripe). Your card is charged when you place the order.
- Sales tax is added where required by law.
§4Shipping
- Domestic US orders ship within 48 business hours and typically arrive within 3–7 business days
- International orders typically arrive within 7–14 business days, depending on customs
- You're responsible for any duties, taxes, or customs fees on international orders
- Once a package is handed off to the carrier, delivery timing is on the carrier, not us. We can help track lost packages but we can't control them.
§5Returns & exchanges
- Unworn, unwashed items can be returned within 30 days of delivery for a full refund
- Wrong size? We'll exchange it free, just email us
- Defective or damaged? We'll replace it immediately, no questions asked
- Custom or wholesale orders are final sale unless defective
- To start a return: email hello@offwiththeirdicks.com with your order number
§6Intellectual property
All artwork, slogans, photography, and copy on this site are owned by Off With Their Dicks, LLC. You can't reproduce them for commercial purposes without our written permission. You can absolutely take a photo of yourself in our hoodie and post it wherever you want — please do.
§7Acceptable use
You agree not to:
- Use the site to harass, threaten, or harm anyone
- Place fraudulent orders or use stolen payment methods
- Scrape, copy, or reproduce our content for your own commercial use
- Try to break the site, bypass security measures, or otherwise mess with it
We may suspend or block any user who violates these terms.
§8Disclaimers & limitation of liability
The site is provided "as is." We don't guarantee it will be free of bugs, downtime, or errors. We do our best.
To the fullest extent permitted by law, our total liability for any claim arising out of these terms or your use of the site is limited to the amount you actually paid us in the 12 months preceding the claim. We are not liable for any indirect, incidental, or consequential damages (lost profits, lost data, etc.).
§9Indemnification
You agree to indemnify and hold harmless Off With Their Dicks, LLC, its members, and contractors from any claims arising out of your misuse of the site, your violation of these terms, or your violation of any third party's rights.
§10Governing law & disputes
These terms are governed by the laws of the State of California, United States. Any disputes will be resolved in the state or federal courts located in California. If a court finds any part of these terms unenforceable, the rest still applies.
§11Changes
We may update these terms from time to time. The date at the top reflects the latest version. Continued use of the site after changes means you accept the new terms.
§12Contact
hello@offwiththeirdicks.com
Off With Their Dicks, LLC
[Your business address goes here once registered]